Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Foamed and Kakked Today

I am sad to say that on the heels of my luncheon victory I must report a terrible failure. Through thoughtless, speedy eating of sugar free pudding and thoughtless gulping (if you could call it gulps) of cranberry protein drink, I first foamed and then heaved. I mean I bent over and kakked a big splat right onto the carpet.

I had to think this over to figure out how it all went wrong. First, I had a busy afternoon at work and did not eat or drink anything from luncheon on. By the time I got home at 4 I was terribly thirsty, crabby, and a little bit light-headed. In the old days (pre-sleeve) I would have stood at the kitchen counter and eaten everything in sight, washing it all down with Diet Coke or Dew. I used to called it a "snack," (DENIAL) but it was actually more like a 4th and 5th meal combined into one big gorge. So, I think what happened was, I still had that gorge coping mentality and without even realizing it unleashed it on my sugar free pudding and protein drink, eating incorrectly, hence kakking. It was the strangest kakking. I felt nothing in my stomach at all, it was like it never made it down. First there was a lot of foamy stuff and then WHAMMO I bent over from the waste, opened my outh and KAKK! There is was. It was reflexive, I had no control whatsoever.

I call this both a victory and a failure. The victory is the sugar free pudding and the protein drink, nothing illegal there. The failure is the speed eating and the kakking, both really bad for sleevesters. I think I will need to prepare myself for this time of day. It's a danger time for me and I am going to have to make sure I slow down and pay attention to what I am doing with food. I also need to make sure I sip my protein drink through the afternoon so I am not so empty and thirsty when I walk through the door.

I hope this doesn't turn me off sugar free pudding. It's been very good to me.

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